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EPIC FAIL of the Day 5/7/12

by on May 7, 2012

1. A man who impersonated his dead mother as part of a real estate scam – using lipstick, manicured nails and even an oxygen tank at a meeting – was convicted of fraud on Thursday and faces up to 83 years in prison, prosecutors said.

Thomas Parkin, 51, was found guilty of 11 criminal counts, including charges of fraud, grand larceny, perjury and forgery for his scams. Along with the real estate fraud, Parkin and a partner cashed his mother’s social security checks every month for six years, stealing about $44,000.

The real estate scam centered on an apartment building in the Park Slope section of Brooklyn that Parkin’s mother, Irene Pruskin, had deeded to her son in the 1990s.

Read more: Yahoo

(I hope this guy realizes that just because Tyler Perry, one of my idols, makes hundreds of millions of dollars dressing like a women doesn’t mean that’s it’s “the cool thing to do” LMFAO! – J.K.)

2. According to news reports, 20-year-old Mahogany Mason-Kelly, who attends Lamar University, had outstanding traffic warrants in Pearland, south of Houston, and was feeling pretty confident about remaining a free woman.

“I still gotta warrant in pearland..those pigs will NEVER catch me!!!…NEVER!!!” she tweeted.

Is anyone besides Mason-Kelly surprised to learn that police monitor Twitter?

As Lt. Onesimo Lopez of the Pearland Police Department told ABC, officers frequently search for keywords such as “Pearland” to “keep abreast of what’s going on in town.”

“This tweet came up. The officer saw it, took a picture and printed it out and gave it to warrant officers,” Lopez said.

Mason-Kelly was arrested Friday. That’s the good news.

The bad news: Turns out she reportedly had impersonated her sister during one traffic stop, so she’s facing more serious charges in addition to the $1,877 in fines for not appearing in court for the traffic tickets, the Beaumont Enterprise says.

Read more: USA Today

(Are you freaking kiddin’ me??? How dumb can you be? Do you really think the cops aren’t hip to Twitter? If it was MySpace I would understand or even Google+ because no one is ever on there, but you’ve gotta be smarter w/ what you tweet or post on Facebook. – J.K.)

3. Police in North Port, Fla., say a man was arrested for robbery after uploading pictures of himself on Facebook posing with the loot and a gun linking him to the crime, the Sarasota Herald-Tribune reports.

Jovan Cummings, 24, and his girlfriend, Nicole Catherine Eaton, 22, were arrested for allegedly robbing a Dollar General in March of $3,000 after assaulting one store employee and binding him with duct tape.

The newspaper says a detective looking at surveillance video thought the robbers looked like Cummings and Eaton, who had previously had run-ins with the law.

A check of photos on Cumming’s Facebook page showed him holding a wad of cash and also wearing what police said was “the exact same hat” as the store robber.

Read more: USA Today

(People like this deserve to be beat up in jail…….for being so dumb! He could probably go free and he would still be caught because of his juvenile mind. – J.K.)

4. A New Jersey woman arrested after police said she brought her 5-year-old daughter into a tanning booth said  Wednesday that she was innocent of the charges but admits to excessive tanning herself.

Patricia Krentcil, 44, pleaded not guilty to second-degree child endangerment and said outside court that she is a “wonderful mother.”

Asked whether she admits to excessive tanning, Krentcil said “yes,” but insisted she would never subject her red-haired, fair-skinned daughter to the heat of a tanning bed.

The girl, who authorities said suffered a sunburn from the tanning booth, was allowed to stay in the home but is now being monitored by state child welfare workers.

Read more: MSNBC

(Did someone tell this lady that the Oompa Loompa’s aren’t real? In my opinion, white people who get over tanned are insecure with themselves and ashamed of their skin color. It’s just like black people who bleach their skin to become light skinned. Be proud of the way God made, accept and embrace yourself and who you are or else no one will – J.K.)

 

5. The Alabama man accused of committing sexual battery on an unconscious LSU fan after the BCS championship football game is being sued.

The LSU fan filed a lawsuit Friday against Brian Downing of Smiths Station, Ala. Downing’s lawyer declined comment Friday night, saying he hadn’t had a chance to read the lawsuit because neither he nor his client had been served.

Downing, 32, was booked on charges of sexual battery and obscenity but the New Orleans district attorney has until June 20 to decide whether to prosecute.

Read more: HuffPo

(I dare a Steelers fan to do that to do a Ravens fan……watch what happens! – J.K.)

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