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EPIC FAIL of the Day 12/27/11

by on December 27, 2011

1. 

2. Newt Gingrich on his first wife Jacqueline: “She’s not young enough or pretty enough to be the wife of the President. And besides, she has cancer.” >>>> And people are actually considering this guy for President? (LA Times)

3. Police say an “extremely intoxicated” man who carried a can of beer into an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting faces charges after he refused to leave the building. The Cincinnati Enquirer reports that police say the man came into a halfway house at 12:15 a.m. Monday. Cincinnati police say Darrin Porter was asked to leave, then was carried out of the building by staffers. After he returned, authorities say they charged the 45-year-old man with disorderly conduct while intoxicated and obstructing official business

Read more: WLKY.com

4. During a visit with military families at a Marine Corps Base in Kaneohe Bay, Hawaii, a curious baby stuck his fingers into President Obama‘s mouth. “What’s going on, man? How ya doing?” President Obama asked during a photo op with the baby’s parents, Captain Greg Wagner and Meredith Wagner, when 8-month-old Cooper Wagnerpoked Obama in the gob.

Read more: Mediaite

5. Ungrateful Americans, smh. With the economy down, you should be grateful your parents still have jobs, jackholes. @Fart via Mediaite

6. Most moms use the holidays to nag you about your relationship status or career choice and it can be annoying, but after hearing this you might be more understanding of your dear ol’ mom. “Human Barbie” Sarah Burge gave a breast implant voucher to her daughter for her seventh birthday this year.

Read more: Nick Cannon

7.  An 18-year-old Pittsburgh man is accused of burglarizing a market with three teens, then posted pictures on his Facebook page showing the suspects mugging with some of the loot.

Isaiah Cutler who has been jailed since Friday in the Dec. 12 burglary. Online court records don’t list an attorney for him.

Police say Cutler, a 17-year-old and two 14-year-olds stole more than $8,000 worth of cash, cigarettes, candy and checks from the business. About an hour later, police say, Cutler posted pictures of the teens posing with the loot on his page on the social networking site. >>>>> Of course someone could be so dumb he’s from Pittsburgh….GO RAVENS – J.K.

Read more: ABC News

8. The Australian Defence force is trying to recruit laid-off soldiers, sailors and air crew from Britain, the US and other western countries in order to fill quotas.

 The Australian reports (subscribers only) the navy has sent a delegation to Britain to discover how many retrenched sailors, particularly engineers, are available.

Read more: NEWS.COM.AU

9. In what’s easily the most fucking reprehensible news to come out of the Jerry Sandusky affair outside of the actual offenses Sandusky’s alleged to have committed, gay video online store TLAGay.com is promoting a “What Would Sandusky Watch?” series, featuring films with titles like Cold Showers andPunish Me. Here’s one synopsis:

When a schoolteacher discovers that the beguiling teen prostitute he once hired is now a student at his school, a scandalous series of events, queer schoolboy drama and lots of nearly-naked shower room scenes ensue. Schoolboy Crush is a Japanese animated film come to life.

Read more: Deadspin

EPIC FAIL PICTURE OF THE DAY

Ever heard of lotion?

EPIC FAIL VIDEO OF THE DAY

If you have any EPIC FAILS you wanna tell me about, email me jmkcool2002@gmail.com, Facebook me: Jessie Karangu or tweet me @BeBreezyMan OR @thejmanproject.

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